Sunday, May 10, 2015

Mother's Day Year Two

It’s Mother’s Day and I am filled with thoughts of the one who fulfilled my lifelong dream of becoming a Mom.  (Well, God fulfilled the dream, but this guy had a huge role in it too.)
I remember with a smile on my face.  At least for now, because let’s face it, year two of loss throws some serious curve balls in our emotions.  But, for now, there is laughter on my breath as my mind flashes to the excitement of decorating the dining room with streamers, balloons and a “Congratulations Daddy” sign to greet my husband home from work.  16+ years ago.  Wow.

Our journey to parenthood included dozens of failed fertility procedures, multiple disastrous adoption stories, loads of tears, endless prayers and years off the calendar of our lives.

But I had received “the” call from our infertility surgeon on this particular afternoon and a joy like no other was radiating from me.  All of the drugs and procedures, the heartbreaks of adoptions that never came to fruition, the months of negative pregnancy tests (we should have bought stock in one of those companies!) were just a memory eclipsed by my happiness.  I could finally open the closed nursery door that mocked me as I exited our bedroom each morning.  We were pregnant with our son!

He walked in the door and stood stunned.  I can still see his face and hear his “Really?  No, really?” and feel his arms lift me off the ground in a swooping hug. Our laughter rings out in my head.

Knowing how long and difficult our road to conception had been, we began the infertility shots and processes again with a six-week old baby in tow to each appointment.  We were so crazy in love with our son and wanted him to have siblings.  The very next February, I was able to surprise Tim with two homemade Valentine’s Day Cards.  One from our boy and one from “Baby #2”.  We welcomed our precious daughter in September and Tim continued in his hands on role of being the best Daddy I have ever witnessed; lovingly caring for me and our children.

Future attempts to conceive children were never successful, but I was blessed to share foster parent responsibilities with this wonderful man as we ministered to four different children before he was diagnosed with leukemia.  

Today, as my children celebrate me and I celebrate my own amazing mom…my mind replays the love story of the man who made me a better mother each day I was by his side.

He encouraged and praised me in my parenting.  He laughed with me behind closed doors over the frustrations of my day.  He honored my role as a stay-at-home mom.  He worked extremely hard to provide for us.  He prayed for me and with me.  He guided our family well and brought joy to my responsibility of motherhood.  We made a great (and goofy) team.

I am honored to be Mom to our children.  I am thankful to Tim for being instrumental in making my dreams of motherhood come true.  We miss him terribly.  He has left a mighty legacy in our children.  I trust God to complete our story. 

Jeremiah 49:11b “and let thy widows trust in me.”

1 comment:

  1. Dear Lori this was absolutely beautiful and brought tears to my eyes.

    Your dear Tim is in heaven cheering you on as you walk this journey by faith without him by your side. God is working in and through you to raise your kids, and He is completing your love story. One day you and Time will be reunited and together you will praise our Awesome God Jesus for all that He has done in your lives.

    Love, hugs and prayers ~ FlowerLady